Early Afternoon Funnies

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pranicfever

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First-year students at Med School were receiving their first Anatomy class with a real dead human body. They all gathered around the surgery table with the body covered with a white sheet. The professor started the class by telling them: "In medicine, it Is necessary to have 2 important qualities as a doctor. The first is That you not be disgusted by anything involving the human body." For an example, the Professor pulled back the sheet, stuck his finger in the butt of the corpse, withdrew it and stuck his finger in his mouth." Go ahead and do the same thing," he told his students. The students freaked out, hesitated for several minutes, but eventually took turns sticking a finger in the butt of the dead body and sucking on it. When everyone had finished, the Professor looked at them and told them, "The second most important quality is observation. I stuck in my Middle finger and sucked on my Index finger. Now learn to pay attention."

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One night, as a couple lays down for bed, the husband starts rubbing
his wife's arm. The wife turns over and says "I'm sorry honey, I've got a
gynecologist appointment tomorrow and I want to stay fresh."

The husband, rejected, turns over. A few minutes later, he rolls back
over and taps his wife again. "Do you have a dentist appointment
tomorrow too?"

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The kindergarten class had a homework assignment to find out about something exciting and relate it to the class the next day. When the time came for the little kids to give their reports, the teacher was calling on them one at a time. She was reluctant to call upon little Johnnie, knowing that he sometimes could be a bit crude. But eventually his turn came.

Little Johnnie walked up to the front of the class, and with a piece of chalk, made a small white dot on the blackboard, then sat back down. Well the teacher couldn't figure out what Johnnie had in mind for his report on something exciting, so she asked him just what that was.

"It's a period" reported Johnnie.
"Well I can see that" she said. "but what is so exciting about a period."

"Buggered if I know" said Johnnie, "but this morning my sister said she missed one. Then Daddy had a heart attack, Mummy fainted and the man next door shit himself."

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"Now learn to pay attention."
ROFLMOA. Now that's funny. I could just picture that happening. I have to go to the bathroom now I think i'm gonna pee myself.
 
thats funny.
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