kristina
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- Nov 20, 2007
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I'm a relatively new smoker. First time was at the begining of September. I only do it on average twice a week. Sometimes three times, sometimes once a week. I'm 28 and never smoked pot until this year.
When I smoke pot, I usually get really happy, laugh A LOT, and say stupid stuff. I generally have fun, though I have gotten paranoid and one time I thought my heart was hurting, but those things only last a short time and then I move on.
Well last night I really FREAKED out. We use a home made vapor thing my husband made. I usually hit it 2-4 times. The first 3 were really mild. So we added more and I took one and a half more. It was super strong. My high usually comes on gradually, but this time it hit me hard. Well I was okay at first, I sent my husband upstairs to get our water bottle. When he was coming down the stairs he was trying to sneak up on my, but I could hear it ( I have super hearing sometimes when I'm high) and the subtle noise of him creeping down the stairs scared me.
Pretty soon I was freaking out. I started asking my husband to help me. Saying I was scared, and afraid; I was going to die. I usually tingle when I'm high, but this time I was shaking uncontrollably. I'm assuming I was having a panic attack. At some point everything got real still and I felt like I could feel electricity surging through me. Then I asked my husband if he was feeling the same thing. He asked me "what" and I said "the conviction of God." I started going on about God and thinking I was going to die and go to hell. I was absolutely terrified. I felt I had disappointed God, but then I'd stop and ask "Is this just the pot?" I couldn't tell if what I was feeling was God, or drug induced. He said this happened to him years and years ago on shrumes. ( He stopped doing all drugs about 10 years ago, and then just recently started smoking pot again)
So anyway, I went through this terror and fear for what seemed like forever. I was saying things like "This can't be real. Is this real? This can't be real, this is a dream." I was also saying, "I never want to do this again, I never want to feel this way again." I was asking God to never let me feel this way again. I even started saying I could understand why people would kill themselves. I felt depressed and wanted everything to stop. I was so overwhelmed by my thoughts and fears. It was crazy. I was afraid I had gone crazy. I couldn't relax, my heart hurt and I was just scared out of my mind. I finaly fell asleep, and felt better this morning, but I'm still not completely better. I still feel slightly anxious and feel slightly stoned. The first time I smoked pot I had like a 2 day hangover, and this feels similar, except I'm anxious not happy.
Soooo any ideas what happened? I did get drunk two nights previous. Drunker than ever, and had a horrible hangover. Could it have been some weird combination?
I'm still not thinking clearly, and my perspective is out of whack. I'm sure I will be feeling normal in a couple days, but I'm concerned about this. I'm considering never smoking pot again.
When I smoke pot, I usually get really happy, laugh A LOT, and say stupid stuff. I generally have fun, though I have gotten paranoid and one time I thought my heart was hurting, but those things only last a short time and then I move on.
Well last night I really FREAKED out. We use a home made vapor thing my husband made. I usually hit it 2-4 times. The first 3 were really mild. So we added more and I took one and a half more. It was super strong. My high usually comes on gradually, but this time it hit me hard. Well I was okay at first, I sent my husband upstairs to get our water bottle. When he was coming down the stairs he was trying to sneak up on my, but I could hear it ( I have super hearing sometimes when I'm high) and the subtle noise of him creeping down the stairs scared me.
Pretty soon I was freaking out. I started asking my husband to help me. Saying I was scared, and afraid; I was going to die. I usually tingle when I'm high, but this time I was shaking uncontrollably. I'm assuming I was having a panic attack. At some point everything got real still and I felt like I could feel electricity surging through me. Then I asked my husband if he was feeling the same thing. He asked me "what" and I said "the conviction of God." I started going on about God and thinking I was going to die and go to hell. I was absolutely terrified. I felt I had disappointed God, but then I'd stop and ask "Is this just the pot?" I couldn't tell if what I was feeling was God, or drug induced. He said this happened to him years and years ago on shrumes. ( He stopped doing all drugs about 10 years ago, and then just recently started smoking pot again)
So anyway, I went through this terror and fear for what seemed like forever. I was saying things like "This can't be real. Is this real? This can't be real, this is a dream." I was also saying, "I never want to do this again, I never want to feel this way again." I was asking God to never let me feel this way again. I even started saying I could understand why people would kill themselves. I felt depressed and wanted everything to stop. I was so overwhelmed by my thoughts and fears. It was crazy. I was afraid I had gone crazy. I couldn't relax, my heart hurt and I was just scared out of my mind. I finaly fell asleep, and felt better this morning, but I'm still not completely better. I still feel slightly anxious and feel slightly stoned. The first time I smoked pot I had like a 2 day hangover, and this feels similar, except I'm anxious not happy.
Soooo any ideas what happened? I did get drunk two nights previous. Drunker than ever, and had a horrible hangover. Could it have been some weird combination?
I'm still not thinking clearly, and my perspective is out of whack. I'm sure I will be feeling normal in a couple days, but I'm concerned about this. I'm considering never smoking pot again.