Here's another one of GG's I found from back in 2005:
I live a 10-minute walk from one of the premier trout fishing rivers in the Pacific Northwest--The Trinity River.
Last December a few weeks before x-mas, I got a hankering to go fishin'.
A neighbor is an avid fisherman and he supplies me with all the fresh-caught trout & salmon I want, and I hadn't been fishing all year.
So I hadn't bought a license for '04. I called the only store within 20 miles and they were all out of 3 and 5 day license's; all they had left were a few yearly ones (which expires 12/31).
Well, I didn't want to pay for an entire year to fish once. Where I fish is pretty remote so I decieded to fish anyway.
So I put my pocket fisherman in my backpack, grab a bucket (I like to keep the fish alive until just before I cook them) and head off for the river.
I had pretty good luck and within 2 hours I had 3 plump 14" 'bows swimming around in the bucket.
I figure that's enough, so I put my pocket fisherman back in my pack, grab the bucket to go home, when a Fish And Game guy drives up in a truck.
Uh-oh.
He sees me and walks up.
"I don't see a fishing license" he says.
"I don't have one" I say.
"Do you know what the fine is for fishing without a license?"
I had to think fast.
"Oh, I wasn't fishing."
He looks down into the bucket at the 3 trout then back at me.
"Those are my pet fish" I said.
"Say what?"
"Yeah I keep them at home in a tank, and every once in awhile I feel they're homesick so I bring 'em down here, let 'em swim around in the river while I smoke a cigarette, then I whistle and they jump back into the bucket and I take 'em home."
"Yeah right."
"Look, I'll prove it" I say. I empty the fish into the river and sit down on a rock and light a cig.
When I finish the cig I get up and start to leave.
"Hey when are you gonna call them back?" he says.
"Call who back?" I say.
"The FISH" he says.
I say "WHAT fish?" and leave.
*
Heartwarming Christmas Story
This sounds made-up, but I swear on a stack of ganja it's 100% true.
It happened about 15 or so years ago. I was home for the holday's.
Christmas was on a Monday that year; I arrived Fri. nite. I planned to meet up with old friends Sat. night and party.
So Sat. afternoon my folks go out to do some last-minute shopping. I stay home and cook up a big batch of happy brownies. I left them on the counter to cool, intending to come back in like a half-hour or so and put the pan of brownies in the trunk of my car.
However, a friend stopped by with some KILLER ganja and we got wasted. I forget about the brownies. We drove over to see another friend and the guys car breaks down (master brake cylinder). We spent the next 3 hours fixing it.
Now, what I did not know was that my folks were having a bunch of people from their church over that night (old people, so the gathering took place starting at 7 p.m.).
It's this church thing called a Circle. It's like 7 church ladies and 4 church gentlemen. They get togteher once a month at different people's houses and around Christmas-time have a "Secret Santa" thing where they exchange gifts. They mainly sit around and gossip.
So people arrive and they bring cake and cookies and stuff like that.
They put thier baked goodies on the counter. Righjt next to my brownies.
So after like an hour of gossiping they pray and hit the goodies. Everyone thought the someone in the Circle brought the brownies.
They partake liberally, washing it down with coffee and tea.
I get home like around 8:30 p.m.
I walk into the living room. My mom was jamming on the organ (something she raely did with company) and everyone's singing and happy and dancing around and laughing.
I go in the kitchen and there's no more brownies.
They partied heartily. I blew off the party I had planned to go to so I could sorta "keep an eye" out, make sure no one tried to drive home baked, etc.
I never told them. I remember my mom and dad talking then next day about how much fun they had at the Circle. "Best one ever" my dad said.
*