Weed cause anger?

[Sampson]

So me and my friends were talking the other day, and my one friend was saying how he realized he needs to be smoking weed because when he doesn't hes the biggest di*khead. Well after we talked all about that I really sat there and was thinking how I realte to that as well. When I don't smoke my anger is bad but when I smoke I'm pretty good, yes I sometimes I get angry, but I don't act how I do when I don't smoke.

I sat there thinking about it, and then I remembered how couple years ago some people in my family were saying how I need to stop smoking weed because its bringing out my anger and helping it/making it worse.


Now I've always had a pretty bad anger issue, and I do try to work on it to get it better and I can say it has got better since I was younger but it is still there. Its not like I'm angry just for the hell of it either, its I get pissed quick, when I'm angry everything else will get to me quicker so I get pissed more, sometimes if I'm angry and like yelling at someone cause they got me angry I say some messed up things etc.

So I was just wondering does smoking weed give you anger? Is there anyone here that can really tell me if it does or doesn't?




Also I do hope I didn't just make me seem like a real tool bag, because I am not. I just have my moments like everyone else, its just I explode differently.

 

[SPEARCHUCKER]

Anger follows any addiction.

 

[HippyInEngland]

Hello Sampson

Any drug will work towards a gain or inflame an already problem.

You have the already problem and all it takes is a stimulant to fire that baby up.

We all have anger, it just takes us as a sole entity to control it.

Some can stem the embers that start the rage, some are willing to fan those embers with no outside help.

When you learn to turn the other cheek and turn your back on things that rouse your anger, then it is you wearing the champion crown and not your anger.

One day you will understand what I am typing.

eace:

 

[ArtVandolay]

Yeah, what HIE said! Avoid conflict. We all know where it resides . As somebody somewhere once said, slow to anger and quick to forgive. Smoke lots of mj, hang out and laugh with us here :hubba:

 

[Alistair]

Well said, Art and HIE. I used to be angry all the time. Then one day I realized that I was angry because I was being stupid. In recent years, I've learned to think of reasons not to be angry. I find that often times, it's a decision to get angry or not.

Regarding weed and anger, some people might smoke too much, and as a result are irritable. I know that if I'm all stoned out and feeling slow, I tend to be irritable if I find myself with people asking me questions and what not, that I'm not in the mood to think about. In other words, if I smoke something that makes me retarded and I don't feel like talking, then I'm better off alone. Now, on the other hand, if the pot I smoke rends to wake me up and put a smile on my face, then I'm not likely to be irritable.

 

[OldHippieChick]

Well, I'm not so sure I'd put a lot of weight into my familys assesment of my anger issues. Maybe you were just more willing to express your true feelings when you were stoned. Maybe you really have valid reasons to be angry with them - only you know. But now the issue is how to accept the feelings without giving away your bliss. It's not what we think it's how we act on those thoughts that defines our life experience and relationships.

I keep my distance from those who make me feel bad about myself. I accept that they never will change because what they are doing works for them.... it preserves their self image. It's my job as an adult to define and preserve my self image without harming others. That last part often gets overlooked when family strives to preserve the status quo.

On a side note - my family preferred me stoned.... I remember getting caught with weed when I was about 16 and my step mother said "well at least she doesn't drink".... hahahahaha.

 

[Sampson]

Thanks everyone for the responses.

I do try and stay away from the people you make me feel bad about myself, and luckly its not a whole bunch of people who do it.

The biggest thing that I am not liking with my anger is me and my girlfriend with fighting. I seem to really see most of my anger happen then but at the sametime I have it with other things but I handle it a lot better. But the anger issue when its dealing with me and my gf is were it seems it gets hardcore. Actaully the reason I made this thread was because of a arguement me and my gf go into.

Let me inform all on what happened so you guys understand how the anger is.

Me and my gf have been together for 1 year and 8 months. In the beginning of our relationship everything was perfect, rare arguments all that jazz. Well through sometime we started to have the typical couple fights. Then it started to get to a point were we argued so much with each other and breaking up back and forth, but we always came back because we love each other deeply. Well were both at different schools and everynight we have our nightly talk before we go to bed. Well it was her birthday the other day and she went out to some party and I had no problem with that. She got drunk and called me and was being a drunk person. Well I was out with my friends and I was like alright well let me go because I can barely hear you and everything, well she flipped and all so we got off. Later on that night we talked (she was sober now) and she was getting mad at me cause we didn't get to have a nightly talk on her bday. Then she started to say that I ruined her birthday. Now she has always been telling me in past arguements that I ruin stuff, so this isn't the first time ever hearing this. When I heard it I got hurt cause I can't believe how I can ruin so much stuff when I didn't do anything! So I ended up snapping and I started to yell on the phone telling her how she hurts me from her always telling me I ruin stuff and all this, I called her a moron and idiot (but to me and my friends those words are like a joke with us, but to her its not and I forget cause me and my friends laugh at it) Eventually during the fight I said were over with because of all this fighting keep on happening. Also because I said she hasn't change the issues she has (blamming me for everything) So now were still broken up, talking kinda but everything is all confusing. Her family hates me now because they see her crying and they right away think this is all me and everything, yes it was me in some way, but at the sametime I wasn't calling her because I wanted to cool off, so she kept calling me yet they thought it was me calling her when I wasn't.

When my anger gets boiling I always seem to black out and don't recall at all what I say. So I know I said some stuff but can't say what cause I have no idea.

What do you guys think I should do to handle my anger to help her and me out?


And before I get someone saying, your to young to know what love is, I may not be 30 in age or haven't been dating this girl for a long time, but I knew this girl since she was 9. She has always been there for me, but at the sametime she has hurt me. So I know this is love because you get that feeling when your with that person, and you know you would do whatever for that person need be.

 

[ArtVandolay]

It takes 2 to argue .
It takes 2 to argue.
It takes 2 to argue.
Smile.
Laugh.
I'm serious :hubba:.

 

[Mutt]

I don't get angry often. esp. when high. When i toke...which is a lot. I gain the patience of Job. I'm so much more tolerant, calm, focused, and of the firm mindset that nothing is gonna bring me down. Even on bad days there still pretty good.
I find maintaining this attitude makes it so when others are mad at me (which is rare) or in a foul mood...they relax around me and become more rational and more open minded. I just simply accept people for who and what they are...if a butthead...i just recognize thats who they are and nothing i do or say will ever change it.
I also have a good talent at making most people at least smile. Even the most hardened witch i can gett to smile and be a lil more friendly.
When i do get angry i take a step back...get my emotions under control then re-approach the problem,.

 

[OldHippieChick]

When my anger gets boiling I always seem to black out and don't recall at all what I say. So I know I said some stuff but can't say what cause I have no idea.

:holysheep: I don't think this has anything to do with pot. Please seek real help in the real world.

 

[Kupunakane]

Yo Ho Sampson,

I'm not going to tell you that it is all the fault of your youth, No-sir, but I would like to share some thoughts that I have picked up on while reading your post.

1. Her family see's her crying. HMMmmm maybe she does feel like her heart is breaking.

2. You indicate that she has always been there for you, Are you really being all that for her ?

3. Her Birthday, perhaps she feels it was ruined cause you being the joy of her heart wasn't there.

Perhaps you might consider rethinking your moves, and here is why.

When you love someone you tear down many of the barriers that we all have a tendency to put up, and in doing so we remove what we were using to protect ourselfs. We are now sorta vulnerable. It is easy to not understand your mates language (men are from mars and women are from venus) , and in a flash one side or the other often mis-understands something said, or maybe even the reason it was said, and the next thing you know BOOOOMMM !!!! It is like a bomb just went off between the two of you.

Myself, I would look to you as a man to understand that we are not born speaking each others language fluently you know ?. So you must take the step that is truly necessary. You take the lead, and you must be a tower of strength for her. Remember though that strength is not a bully, nor does it condemn, but real strength seeks ways towards peace, it bolsters love. You must build her up, and never tear her down. I may get into trouble with this comment, but I always understood that women were to be protected, never shamed or yelled at.
As for your getting angry, I would recommend you sit down some time, and list out all the reasons that you can think of that cause you to feel angry.
The trick is then to tackle them one at a time so that you are not over-whelmed by them. Handling them one at a time gets them dealt with and you move on. Simple as that.

Who controls who ? I mean does your anger control you to the point that you say or do something monumentally stupid, or do you have a death grip on your own anger ?
Once you can master dealing with your own anger then you will be a lot more prepared to help your lady with hers, that's why you need to take the lead my man.

I will keep you close in thought my friend, and thank you for allowing us the privilege of trying to help, I hope that this does.


smoke in peace
KingKahuuna

 

[Budders Keeper]

Yo Ho Sampson,

I'm not going to tell you that it is all the fault of your youth, No-sir, but I would like to share some thoughts that I have picked up on while reading your post.

1. Her family see's her crying. HMMmmm maybe she does feel like her heart is breaking.

2. You indicate that she has always been there for you, Are you really being all that for her ?

3. Her Birthday, perhaps she feels it was ruined cause you being the joy of her heart wasn't there.

Perhaps you might consider rethinking your moves, and here is why.

When you love someone you tear down many of the barriers that we all have a tendency to put up, and in doing so we remove what we were using to protect ourselfs. We are now sorta vulnerable. It is easy to not understand your mates language (men are from mars and women are from venus) , and in a flash one side or the other often mis-understands something said, or maybe even the reason it was said, and the next thing you know BOOOOMMM !!!! It is like a bomb just went off between the two of you.

Myself, I would look to you as a man to understand that we are not born speaking each others language fluently you know ?. So you must take the step that is truly necessary. You take the lead, and you must be a tower of strength for her. Remember though that strength is not a bully, nor does it condemn, but real strength seeks ways towards peace, it bolsters love. You must build her up, and never tear her down. I may get into trouble with this comment, but I always understood that women were to be protected, never shamed or yelled at.
As for your getting angry, I would recommend you sit down some time, and list out all the reasons that you can think of that cause you to feel angry.
The trick is then to tackle them one at a time so that you are not over-whelmed by them. Handling them one at a time gets them dealt with and you move on. Simple as that.

Who controls who ? I mean does your anger control you to the point that you say or do something monumentally stupid, or do you have a death grip on your own anger ?
Once you can master dealing with your own anger then you will be a lot more prepared to help your lady with hers, that's why you need to take the lead my man.

I will keep you close in thought my friend, and thank you for allowing us the privilege of trying to help, I hope that this does.


smoke in peace
KingKahuuna

Thank you KK. I sincerely think you should be Knighted into Sainthood...errr, however that works I can only hope my path will cross with someone who is at such peace with themselves and the world. BK

 

[Sampson]

Thank you everyone again for the replies. I am not angry at any comments that was said, I'm open to hear anything even if your going tell me I'm a psycho idiot who needs help.

KK. Yea her family does see her in pain on how things are going with us, but they don't exactly know what is going on. Thats one thing I hate with her family hating me because they see her crying but they don't know what is happening. They seen her cry 3 times, but 2 of those times were because she did something and was apoligzing for what she did, but her family just by passes what she is saying, and just goes by shes crying and on phone with me, so it has to be my fault.

She has been always there for me and I have been at the sametime to. Both of us had some very sadding (if thats a word) things happening to our lives when we were younger to now almost. So we both have been there to comfort ad help each other.

And her birthday, shes not mad that I couldn'tbe there, she understands I couldn't because of money (were about a 4hrs plane ride, about a full day or more of driving distance). Plus she got for her bday a plane ticket to come out and see me this Weds.

I've been taught ever since I was younger to treat that person you love like a queen. And even though it seems like I may not, I really do. I do treat her great but at times when we argue its not great. We both even say to each other, when its good were great but when its bad were horribly bad, theres really never a inbetween, its either great or horrible.

I have talked to shrinks in the past but they never really helped me out at all. I then one good time decided to smoke some weed and I found that weed helped my anger a lot. Then I stoped do to law issues and my anger was intense, so I ended up going to see a doctor to talk about getting on some sort of meds to help me with my ADHD and anger. I've been on this medicine (almost like adiral but its not) since summer but I don't know.

 

[Sampson]

Man I feel more and more like crap now. I was just on the phone with her because she was asking me if she should even come down weds to see me, I said yes I do want her to come the only thing I am nervous is that I just got hired at a new job and I am in the process of orientation/training and the lady told me that she plans on finishing up that this week, so I said I don't want to end up having her just sitting at my house bored till I get done the work. She understood kinda but was like well tell your boss you had this planned, but really she told me about this last week, and at that sametime I said I may have to work and she understood. Then she goes well if your goin want me to come you have to talk to my dad. This guy absolutely hates me and has a anger issue if not like mine worse then mine, hes already yelled stuff at my when I was on the phone with her before. And I am trying to tell her I can't talk to this guy because hes going say something and I am trying to help my anger by not associating with people who treat me like he did.

 

[2Dog]

something I figured out a long time ago in my relationship is that I would rather be happy than right..Meaning I would have told her sorry I made you feel that way I love you and want this right. It's how I handle hubby. What is the point of arguing with someone when you cant agree or change their mind right? also long distance relationships must be very hard. You guys are a team and teamates may disagree but they shouldnt tear each other down the world does enough of that u guys should be each others shelter. I think you and her need a code word . Anytime she feels upset or you feel upset and it starts getting heated have it agreed upon that you will stop the conversation and go for a walk and revisit it...Also maybe make a commitment to not yell at each other. when I read u were working and didnt think u would have time for her I thought hes over it and ready to move on...Are we talking a normal 8 hour work day where you could hang out that night? Maybe this relationship is too much work and you are better off friends...only you know. But if you guys arent seeing each other often and fighting like that I am thinking it wont work unless you both learn compromise and truly want to be together...in my heart I think when you find the right person it wont be this hard.

 

[leafminer]

sampson, just a thought, test yourself for Aspergers.
Some of the things you said seemed a little familiar.

 

[The Effen Gee]

Anger follows any addiction.

True.

But anger does not cause addiction.
Whatever underlying emotions you have that are causing this anger need to be addressed before you can make any real changes.

Emotionally, one could try to not rely on substances. If possible, figure out what part of your life, past or preasent that is causing this imbalance.

....Although I do try to stay high most of the time, my periods of sobriety are good to recharge and restabilize. Quite a few famous drug user/authors claim that the most important periods for ones mind is during the come down period from strong psychoactive substances. The claim is the mind and brain are re-setting on some levels. One can use this opportunity to focus on the basic internal needs.

"What do I need to do to be really happy?"
"What is really important to me as a human, physically and Emotionally?" "How much of this life is really essential, how much can I let go of ?"

Anger is never just anger, general or acute. THere is always an underlying cause. Insecurity, Helplessness, Fear and self doubt can cause anger, as it is a secondary emotion. Assess and Adress. Even if you have to go places emotionally that mat make one uncomfortable there is nothing wrong with feeling a certain way, society says otherwise and this leads to complications. Men especially are expected to be tough, hardened and NEVER cry. Why? DOes it really matter? For some definately. Enough to where the root emotion can cause anger due to a conflict internally.

These things are complicated and commonly wrapped in denial.

Cannabis is a wonderful thing, but should never be depended on for daily life if possible.

Hope any of this is usefult to anyone, I just need to get it out there so I dont forget my "reprogramming".

 

[Budders Keeper]

I wish I had some words of wisdom for you Sampson. The best I can do is give kudo's to all who have givin such wonderful advise. I have found many statements in this thread that have helped me. Thanks to all who responded, and thank you Sampson for putting yourself out there like that, and starting this thread that I am sure will help many. BK

 

[Sampson]

Thank you everyone for the responses and advice I highly appreciate it. So far my anger has been good, and me and the gf discussed things and she is still coming out tomarrow to see me because we think it will help. We do know that the distance is killing us. We don't get to see each other as often as we would like to since we both have school and because of money. But were hoping next year things will be different since one of us is transfering.

2Dog- I took your advice on the "come up with a word that lets us know to switch subject" and discussed it with the gf and she agreed that it would be smart. As well we agree to if one of us are getting angry with something, just tell the other person I gotta get off the phone, and just let them get off so it helps.

leafminer- Thank you for posting that advice. I am actaully going be seeing my doctor in a week or 2 since they need to do a hour long test. This is the doctor that is prescribing me to my ADHD meds, so I will mention that to her and see what she thinks.

Budders Keeper- Your post still gave wisdom, I don't need my questions answered just for it, you showed that people on here helped you out in the past, and that just inspires me that it'l do the same with me. No need to thank as well for posting this, I know I needed help and this forum was the place to go. I figured someone else may have the same issue and might be scared on people judging them, so I posted it to help me and for whoever else who is in the same boat as me.

I have been thinking alot about my anger, and wondering what could be on my mind that is helping this anger. My mom and dad got divorced several years ago because of him cheating on her and I know that has a part of dealing with it. I live with my mom and I had to see her in the pain she was because she was struggling on raising 3 kids, and getting fired from a jobs, and then I turn my head and hear how amazing my father is making all this cash and how he bought 2 houses and all this other crap. Seeing that always killed me, I can say this and have no problem saying it, I'm a mama's boy to the extreme, I mean my mom is my girl, I love her dearly and when I see her in pain, I get anger and I do what I have to do to get her to smile.

Hopefully I can think of more things that may involve the anger issue.

But once again I thank you all for commenting and helping me out.

 

[dman1234]

When my wife is pissed at me, and we smoke a joint,

PUFFF shes not mad anymore, or atleast she stops letting
me know shes mad, wich is just as good.

whats good is you are aware of your anger issue, thats the first step.