I Want To Just Cry

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K

Kupunakane

Guest
Hi Guys,
I think most of y'all know me a bit, and I sure gotta say that I feel so very happy here with you guys. You all have been a real comfort and joy to me.

Last Thursday, I went to the VA Hospital to see my Dr. He is a Gastroenterologist, and a damn good one in my opinion. He and I talked a lot about me and my medical self, and it turns out that I am down to about 10% percent liver function, and kinda teetering on the edge so to speak. So curious that I am I asked what it would take to push me into falling. He said as little as a glass of wine could send me into what they call an event. It's where your Liver functions stop and they gotta try to spark it back into working.
Now the painful part, I asked my Dr. if smoking marijuana would disqualify me for the liver transplant, and he said YES it would be enough to kick or prevent me from getting on the list, and he also said that they have a way of looking at you a year ago. ( I checked it out) and yes they can track MJ use up to a year.
So my options are to allow myself to not get a transplant, and just slowly die with my family, but at least I will be comfortable and I can smoke my brains out even though it is still Illegal in my State. or I can beat myself up trying to lose weight, (which is good), stop smoking MJ period, and hope that I can last long enough for it to all clear, then IF I get the transplant which is a big "IF", cause there are so many waiting for a Liver, then I can look forward to bouts of rejection, a gazillion pills a day, and continuing to jump through the Dr.'s hoops, all for an average of 5 years extra if you survive. In my case the new liver will be under attack instantly, and I will still have the illness, I just get hopefully more time.
I just can't understand why there is all this rama-rama about something that is so benificial like MJ.
It all comes down to the quality of life, but there are so many thoughts that come with it, that I am actually feeling burned out. I thank God I got you guys to talk to, and I swear no matter what my final out come, I will always be ready to smoke with you.
By the way, if I go for the transplant, you can bet that as soon as the new liver is in, and I am away where it is safe I will spark one so fast as to make a person's head spin, after all what could they possibly do to me at that point ? Take it back ? Ha-Ha I don't think so.

Thanks for tolerating my rant, and yes I am extremely nervous about this.

smoke in peace
KingKahuuna
 
Wow KK, what can I say? I'm so sorry to hear about your dilemma. You and your family are in my prayers.
 
what a crock!
sorry m8, i don't really know what to say.. that's rediculous that while waiting for possible help you can't use your pain medication because our world is so backwards :(
so pathetic that they'll shove all sorts of chemical medications down your throat, but the organic clean straight from mother earth meds that probably work better are illegal because.. who knows why anymore?
 
My heart goes out to you!It's your life & you'll do whats best for you and your family.I'm with The Effen Gee,comfortablity.Hope all is well with you!
 
I will pray fro you. My brother is Dying of pancratic cancer tthat moved into his Liver. So i have an idea what your family will be going thru.
I am betting that this all has something to do with that Chili you made
 
:yeahthat:

My thoughts are with you and your family, KK. Hang in there.
 
I personally want nothing long and drawn out, when my time comes, it comes.

Life is for enjoying, not spending the last few years petrified that anything I do will send me to where im guaranteed to go anyway.

This is your call KK, we will all have to make a choice like this at some time of our life.

I type the above with how I think at this moment, but once confronted with it, I may think differently.

Ive just researched the transplant list waiting times, after certain age, far fewer transplants are carried out, that is a huge 'IF'.

Do what you think best KK.

You are in my thoughts :)
 
King im sorry to hear about what your going thru. theres no way i can understand what your feeling. i will say that myself and many other members im sure are always here if you need a place to vent or a friendly ear. your humor has brought me many smiles and your kindness inspires us all.
 
KingKahuuna, I'm very sorry to hear that. You did mention losing weight. It seems like it would be easier and more enjoyable to learn to live more healthily, exercise and lose weight, than to do all that and quit smoking too. It's impossible to tell someone in your situation what to do. I hope you're able to make a decision with which you're happy and able to live with.
 
I am just in aww right now KK... I feel for your situation.. My mother was in this same situation last year... not with the smoking part, but choosing which way to go.. whether to fight the disease or to make what time is left the best it can be....

Whichever you decide to go, I support you 100% of the way man......
 
Man, seriously keep us posted on whats going on.
:postpicsworthless:
Sorry had to
 
KK..I am new to this site but have viewed many of your threads...I am also a vet...so I say fight it...do what ever it takes..If you have to lose weight then lose the weight..if you have to quit smoking then quit..get your head right! After the shock wears off..get up and fight this thing...give it your all..you did it once in the service for uncle sam now do it for yourself..if you go out go out with a snarl and a clinched fist in the air and not a I wish I would of...could of...you are stong enough and lots of people will help you through the bad times.
 
I get outraged that something as harmless as marijuana could prevent someone from trying to extend their life. Laws need to change immediatly. I don't know you well KK but whatever your choice I support you, and if you do go into surgery I hope your transplant goes as smoothly as the best Botanist's pot plant transplant.
 
Whatever you chose, enjoy it all to it's best, even if it means you gotta put up with low-fat food ;)

Sending good vibes your way, King :)
 
Hi KK, I would like to meet you in person some time big guy. You don't often get a good vibe thru yer flat screen from someone, but you've got that what I call 'good people' quality that just sings thru your posts. Given my personal financial state sharing a smokes not likely to happen on your home ground so unless you find yerself stranded in the midwest for some reason....:eek: ! Take care King, and keep in touch as much as you can, ya here?

The smoking lamp is lit.;)
 
Whatever you decide to do will be the right thing, KK.

Perhaps you could give the community a short education on the critical importance of becoming organ donors. So many unknowing people take their life-giving organs to the grave just because they don't know any better.
 
KK you and your family will be in our prayers. My uncle died from cancer 2 years ago and his wife from cancer 2 years before. They left behind two young children. I is a sad thing you are going through and God works in strange ways that we do not always understand. Keep the faith and we will continue to pray for you.

God Bless
MCM
 

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